Money, Communication, & My Wife

When there's plenty of money coming in it's not hard to talk about budgets. It's when things get tighter and expenses are cut that these discussions are a little tougher to have.

I hate disappointing my wife. That's the bottom line. And when I have to tell her that she can't spend as much or we can't go out to eat, I feel like I'm not doing my job as husband and provider. I want her to have everything she wants and more but, at the same time, I have to make sure what we do fits into our budget.

Last week, I had been going over some numbers and making some tweaks to our budget. I noticed that we had been over spending on our monthly American Express bill. I found that if the trend continued we would be in some trouble later on in the year. I calculated the new magic number for the AmEx bill and it was much lower than what we had grown accustom to over the past few months.

I wasn't sure what to do. I didn't want to present this new (and leaner) budget to her. But at the same time, I couldn't allow the status quo to continue.

In passing one night, N. mentioned how well our spending was on the AmEx this month. I told it was good but we needed to be cautious to keep it at the new number I had come up with. She inquired to where the new number came from and I showed her the new budget I had developed. She was very quiet and we did not speak of it again that night.

The next day we started talking about it. She said, at first, she thought there was no way we could do anything with a number that low. But once she thought about it, it wasn't as bad as she had initially thought and could be quite workable. She told me that if I would keep her more informed of our financial ins-and-outs she could play a better part in meeting our financial goals.

The lesson I learned was that if I made a better effort to communicate with my wife on financial matters I could avoid uncomfortable conversations later on. One good thing that came out of our talk was to employ having money talks on a regular basis. A talk once a week, like Sunday evening, to update ourselves on where we are in relation to our goals. Are there any big expenses coming up? Where is our money going? Things like that. I really feel these new "Money Meetings" will help us weather these tight times. And in the end, I think it will help strenghten our relationship along with our bottom line.

Budget from 2 to 1

Our son will be a year and half next month and I really feel like I'm just now getting a good grasp on what our monthly expenses should be. Considering all the life changes we've been through in this short time, I guess things are finally settling into a regular routine for us.

Let's recap:

• My son, C., was born in February
• My wife, N., quits her job in March
• Pay off hospital bills for son & wife in March
• I pay off our SUV loan in April (I'm kinda regretting the SUV purchase right about now)
• Accept a new job in Mississippi in May
• Move from Alabama to Mississippi in June
• Live with my in-laws for two months
• Purchase our first house in June
• Move into new home in August

I guess I realized around December of last year that we were still spending like we still had two incomes. Going out to eat a lot (with the family or at lunch during work). My wife is way into baby clothes. Lucky for me, she only buys designer baby clothes. Also the baby necessities add up pretty quickly too. Diapers, formula (we had to buy the expensive sensitive formula), baby wipes, Diaper Genie refills.

Before I knew it, the monthly AmEx bills was really starting to eat into my checking account. It was at Christmas I realized I wouldn't have enough in the bank to cover all our costs. Unfortunately, that's when we broke out the credit cards.

The company I work for gives out yearly bonuses in March, so I knew I would have that check plus a pretty hefty tax return and economic stimulus check to cover all those over runs with some left over to help rebuild our emergency fund and start my son's 529 fund.

Our challenge now is to continue to keep a tight hold on our expenses. It's been painful considering the freedom we had prior to our son's arrival. I should be getting a promotion in December that should help us out. I'll keep updates on how we do.

Amazon vs. eBay

Over at Free Money Finance, he has the $10k Challenge. Basically, he tasks his readers to create other streams of income outside their normal 9 to 5 jobs. Lately, I've been thinking alot about what I can do to create some extra income. Hence, the new blog.

The one I hear most is "Sell stuff on eBay". The thing that bothers me is that eBay is not the end-all be-all of online merchants. Frankly, I find eBay is more pain than prosperity. I prefer Amazon's Marketplace. I was turned on to Amazon in 2004 and I've been addicted ever since. My wife says that I would sell anything not nailed down. Over the past 4 years I've netted about $2,500 selling the following stuff:

• Books
• Textbooks
• CDs
• DVDs
• Old VHS tapes
• Video Games
• A Palm Pilot
• A PS2
• A PSP
• Some computer network hardware
• A digital voice recorder
• Pretty much anything with an ISBN number

That's the thing! With eBay, you've got to take pictures, come up with a description, decide what categories it will be listed in, how will shipping be handle, etc. etc. etc. Frankly, it's more work than its really worth . Plus, if you item doesn't sell, you still owe eBay just for listing the item.

Amazon is so much easier. Type in the ISBN number and there's all the information about the item you're selling. A picture, a description, everything. You set your price and confirm what shipping options you'd like to offer. Amazon subsidizes the shipping costs for you so if you can ship it for cheaper you make even more. Amazon takes a small commission only if you sell an item. Items listed on Amazon are active for 60 days so you can set it and forget. All you have to do is package and ship the item when Amazon tells you its sold.

To me, Amazon is so much better. I have sold a few things on eBay but nowhere near the amount of business I've done on Amazon. I wouldn't mind doing a bigger volume of business on Amazon but for right now I think I'll continue to sell odds and ends from around the house.

What are your thoughts? Have you had similar experiences? Which do you prefer?

Welcome to Tink No More

TINK - Two Incomes, No Kids

Back in the day, that's what my wife and I used to be. Not any more. I'd like to use this blog as a resource to chronicle the financial (and emotional) difficulties going from two incomes to one with a new child.

Please bear with me, I'm new to blogging so I'll be feeling my way through this.

I'll have more to come later.